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prose III - happiness, optimism by shehrozeameen


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March 26
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Start high school in mute excitement as the oily bus trundles you away. It will never be replaced. In third year, it will be replaced. Lose your phone a day before the bus change. Phones do not like you. One will jump into thieving hands/ the North Sea on the Belgium trip. You must go to that. It is brilliant. Do not, DO NOT, ask anyone out on it.
You will get and love your Nokia brick. It is unbreakable. It will get a crack in its screen and you will be surprised; it will be one of the few times in which everyone is surprised at something you are surprised at too. Joining any clubs will make you uncool. Mingling awkwardly by the canal or the pitch is how you gain respect. Be scared to go out of the school building until boredom drives you to three parks and eventually Sainsbury's. The first park you will leave because someone will try to bludgeon you. The second one you will leave because there are neds at it. Everyone you are scared of is a ned. The third park you will leave when the next year comes up and you realize you are not special. You are special, and so are your friends. Your friends are amazing and you love them. Embrace the two hours given to you as, by principle, you are children. Teachers are entwined by tradition to find the first years difficult. Only two groups are not outsiders and not uncool. Go for the band nerds who like music only if with 30M+ view. Try to fit in with them even though you don't try because you are not pathetic. Midnight-you will yawn and tell you you are pathetic. Proclaim this at day without feeling it. The best way to fit in with the band nerds who like music only if it has 30M+ views is to get drunk at parties. You do not need a liver to pass your exams. The sensible groups will exclude you if you drink, so don't. Join at least one club. Choose Press. Do not sell the papers because doing so will make you brave, and there is a 10% chance the queues will be too busy. Selling papers will make you an outsider. Don't sell so you can get sympathetic chuckles from passers by from the cool groups so far up it's like their on their own cardboard pantheon. By principle, believe they will fall in a trail of ember snow. Fall in love with that line ("Fall from a trail of ember snow from [pronoun] cardboard pantheon") but never use it anywhere. Your friend group, if outsider, will make you have social overkill, and there will be weeks in which you are the antagonist. Believe you are the protagonist of your life, then glance longingly at corridor storms, and go back to being the antagonist. Believe that Ozymandias Complex is a thing. Midnight-you will keep on yawning like this. Love the word Ozymandias. To properly become the protagonist, either a) grow up. Second year will be the best year of your life because there is only a 1% chance that the queues might be too busy. Weed may be apocalyptic but it will get you friends with calm people. Everyone is not passively-aggressively trying to attack you. In third year, you will find out they were/are. Maybe. There is a 10% chance the queues will be too busy. Do not become an artist. Listen to your English teacher. Pester your R.E teacher to put on The Matrix even though he never will. You will never see the end of Forrest Gump. Your maths teacher was not a part of the army. Neither was the monkey. The monkey doesn't actually exist. Your friends are amazing and you love them. Love everyone. Be so socially awkward you care about the underdogs to the point you hate everyone. Even yourself. You are not the antagonist, whatever that storm-and-a-half in the corridor says. Stop writing about that storm-and-a-half poetically. He hates poetry. Find that ironic, considering. Midnight-you should not be listened to. Preach his yawns anyway. He overthinks. Overthink; your strongest subject is philosophy after all. Your friends are amazing and you love them. To love you will have to isolate yourself for two years from the friends you went to the park with. Hate the fact that to gain your own level of sanity you have to hurt others feelings. Lie to yourself and say you are overthinking. You are overthinking. Do not hurt your friends, they are amazing and you love them. Do not buy a box of cereal and eat it while wandering the Spanish corridors barefoot; this will not gather the attention of storms in corridors. Tell yourself you are a discount gay friend. You will be too weird for the not-outsider girls, they are like the band nerds who take an interest in music with 30M+ views but with reminiscence. Stay away from them because you are scared you would be shooting cupid-arrows at the wrong targets until they're all dead. After all, there is a 10% chance the queues will be too busy. You will be too weird for the strawberry grenade but too normal for the sensible groups. Argue with the strawberry grenade until you become the antagonist. If you do not argue he will explode in your face repeatedly with the unfaithful truth. Lose faith in God, and instead become a theist borne of causes and necessities. Life is not a movie, it is a novel with no epilogue and only plot points. Life is not a book, it is a consequence machine. Your friends are amazing and you love them. You cannot fit in with the band nerds who have an interest in music with 30M+ views or the sensible groups or the non-outsider girls or alcohol bottles or joints. Your friends are amazing and you love them. The canal is beautiful. Your friends are amazing and you love them. Run away from school at least once; it isn't apocalyptic and stops you throwing up with anxiety into swimming pools. Your friends are amazing and you love them. Hopefully you will find out you are amazing and do the same thing. For the love of the consequence machine/God{you haven't decided), do. The goal of your novel is to get beyond 3000 on Snake. Your friends are amazing and you love them.

You will not die at the end of this.

After all, there is only a 10% chance that the queues will be too busy.
artishardrecords.bandcamp.com/…

School.
Best long thing I've written in a while. Maybe completely. 

I'm not adding line breaks.

word Count: 1103

1. Well?
2. Favourite line?
3. Least favourite line?
4. Anything else?
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:iconwildfirepen:
wildfirepen Featured By Owner Jun 12, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
This is beautiful beautiful beautiful. I'm torn between nodding fiercely and feeling intense gratitude that someone wrote this so perfectly and jealousy that it wasn't me. :P Thank you, thank you, thank you. 
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:iconayeaye12:
AyeAye12 Featured By Owner Jun 12, 2014  Student Writer
You are very welcome. :hug:
I'm glad I managed to resonate well with you :)
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:iconjackgunski:
jackgunski Featured By Owner Apr 12, 2014
I don't do other people's numbering system, so I'll just do my own.

First of all, you're very observant for noticing that nobody in the course of human history has ever seen the end of Forrest Gump, not even the director (I think... I think Jenny, like... oh I don't know, I just keep seeing the ping pong scene.)

Second of all, this uses maybe my favorite device in all of literature. Repetition. I love repetition.

This prose is amazing. That's it.
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:iconayeaye12:
AyeAye12 Featured By Owner Apr 12, 2014  Student Writer
Hahah xP

Repetition is pretty cool, glad to hear you liked it :3

Thank you overall for your nice comment!
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:iconshehrozeameen:
shehrozeameen Featured By Owner Apr 12, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
I'll admit that this work was hard to read in a single setting, but with that said, it was fun. The humour makes it worthwhile in my honest opinion. It somewhat reminded me of jackgunski in some ways. Overall though, its a worthwhile read, and I liked it.
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:iconayeaye12:
AyeAye12 Featured By Owner Apr 12, 2014  Student Writer
Yeah, I can imagine the lack of spacing would do that :0
But glad you found it worthwhile!

A big influence was after listening to some Ian Scholes, but I'll check out this jackgunski too, thanks :3
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:iconshehrozeameen:
shehrozeameen Featured By Owner Apr 12, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
(nodding) Yay!
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:iconjustreese:
JustReese Featured By Owner Mar 31, 2014  Student Writer
The set up, and the way it just keeps going and going, fits so perfectly with what you're talking about.

The contradictions are fantastic. And true.

Favorite 2 lines: "Everyone is not passively-aggressively trying to attack you" and "To properly become the protagonist, either a) grow up"


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:iconayeaye12:
AyeAye12 Featured By Owner Mar 31, 2014  Student Writer
Thank you for understanding! And liking the contradictions. Those were important for the piece, I think.
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:iconcerealnovels:
cerealnovels Featured By Owner Mar 29, 2014
"The goal of your novel is to get beyond 3000 on Snake." Is my favorite line. I am struggling on my own writing front and just sticking with it is hard. Nice stream of consciousness in this. 
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